I just figured out my youngest was pretending to be reading or listening to sparkle stories (super wholesome and sweet audio stories we love) so much of this summer when instead he was watching dumb Youtube videos and sneakily playing video games online. At least everything was made for kids. He is 11 and nothing was gross which would have been way worse.
I didn’t yell because I didn’t have to. He knew how I felt and he is feeling bad or at least shitty for getting caught.
I’m bummed. I really don’t like being lied to, and he did countless times this summer when I asked him what he was up to.
Each of my children have done this now at some point.
I was a no screens momma for a lot of their lives.
I know in a way its a part of growing up.
It still sucks and feels crappy.
To be lied to from your kid. And all the lost hours he could have been playing outside or creating something or what have you.
I share because these screens offer such a pull.
I am feeling great in life and doing well and for some reason today and some days I checked Facebook like 20 times or something.
Yuck I don’t like it when I do that.
I know the pull easy entertainment has. I use facebook, instagram, and youtube for mine. I could justify a lot of it If I wanted to But why bother.
The truth is
Tonight I felt gross for checking facebook so much. I wondered what was playing deep in me to be so tied to it going back for more. I was/am craving connection I think? Connect to the moment Gina, the lighting in your space the feeling of being alive, do something else don’t open the…. oops too late.. That’s kinda how it can go.
I know you’ve been there too. Well I would guess perhaps you have too?
I am tied to my phone more than I want to be and I bet 50% - to maybe as much as 70% of it or so would be unnecessary.
Ok so I am a woman who wants answers and solutions asap.
My son lost his Chromebook for the rest of summer and he needs to keep his door open which is kinda silly because he wont have his Chromebook so what would he be able to do but it was what allowed for his sneakiness.
I just paused my typing and searched and read up on the “best apps to help limit screen time for yourself”
I ended up downloading and setting up here an app called one sec.
It looks good and will cost me 20$ a year if I use it. It’s a free 7 day trial now.
I imagine I will keep it and use it.
I just set it up and it looks promising. It will ask me my intention when opening Facebook and Instagram. It will track my mood, give me alterative ideas of what to do that I added in and give me the option to turn back and not open the app
.So its a day of some adjusting for both my highest and best and my sons. For us to disentangle ourselves from our screens.
I think I have music for this topic… I am going to go clean up the kitchen from our dinner mess and see what songs I can remember and find and then return here to wrap this share up…
Ok got some.
so our first song is what I think I am searching for.. approval, love, being seen, feeling of interest. But knowing I am not going to find or be able to feel the energy I desire through my screen. I think this song is the biggest stretch lyrically for this one but It’s a lovely song and has the energy of the low of the trap of checking social media too much.
Then we move on to the reality that time is moving fast and Life is here to be had.
And our last song I am hearing in a new frame of mind tonight. Instead of a Woman singing to a man (the way I have always heard it) What if it was the Sacred Aliveness of this moment singing to us? Would I not want to call my attention back to the unfolding now and Dance with the Divine in the present time happening? and Just put my phone down already.
I am pretty sure my headline of this one is at the root of the problem with checking social media too often.
the headline said
One Sec.. 🤳I'm just checking to see ...if people still love me.
I check social media more when I just posted something and I am trying to feel out am I still safe? Do my friends still love me? Is that share going to be appreciated or unseen/ignored? I am pretty sure my desire to be loved is at the core.
I look forward to seeing how one sec the app does and how much it helps.
I just set a reminder on my phone to check back in and let you know how I like the app in a month or so.
So it’s not like this deep problem for me I am not tortured around this I just know I want to be free from this loop.
I remember learning that with cigarettes the act of smoking a cigarette only keeps you satisfied for 12 mins and then the cravings will begin again.
I wonder what it is for social media?
I am sending my love.
Have a good one and be well. I appreciate you
💖-Gina
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